Case 07: The Portrait of a Lily (5)

With the long, long story finally over—

Krishna-san took a sip of iced tea, which was now completely lukewarm.

Even though it was early October, the sound of cicadas reached my ears, as if representing the unyielding summer that persisted.

In any case, I had no idea what I should say. It was my first time hearing this story, and yet somehow, I felt like I had heard it somewhere before.

“The reason I became involved with the world beyond -- well, it was because of this. I must continue to investigate. I have to keep looking into the traces of the faint ‘them’ that Senpai referred to. Their sorrow. Their delusions. I have to keep my mind steady so I don’t get swallowed up by it, and proceed with their classification. If I don't do that – then sooner or later, I’ll be swallowed by her eyes.”

Krishna-san spoke with a somewhat distant look in her eyes.

“I don’t know if what I’m doing is actually confronting things. Maybe I'm just running away. But by watching my Ayana Takamura-senpai up close, I learned that there was a world I could not step into, no matter what. I learned that there was a world right next to us we shouldn’t get deeply involved in. That’s why I felt I had to classify it. And that was the beginning of the website ‘Ikaigabuchi’.”

I squirmed and looked to the side, and saw Yoishi sitting there, expressionless as ever.

A few days had passed since Krishna-san had lost consciousness in the club room.

On that afternoon, Yoishi and I had been abruptly called up to the club room by Krishna-san, and while I had expected her to start lecturing us, she unexpectedly told us the story about her high school days. The story behind her Senpai who had disappeared.

“That was not Senpai’s only experiment involving taboo words. She had placed countless taboo words on stone monuments, the school anthem, and student council slogans that students casually looked at throughout the school. Most of them have now been corrected or removed. But I didn't know about that book mixed in with the other library books.”

The petite occult site manager spoke with a sorrowful face that was uncharacteristic of her.

The book she was talking about was of course ‘Rororo’. The book that bastard Sako had taken away, it seems the crazy person who put the book there was her Senpai. In the clock tower, in the cat, in the club room early in the morning, and in the library, I learned that the dark gaze that had been staring at me was apparently her.

“So, after that Senpai of yours disappeared, that’s when you met Sako?”

Krishna-san silently nodded.

“I told you before that I had been through a lot – well, even after I changed everything to new in the literature club room, I still continued to hear Senpai’s voice for a while. I ultimately met him through a priest who knew my parents. That was when I finally managed to stop hearing Senpai’s voice – but it still didn’t disappear completely. Just by living my life, my spine naturally distorts, and I start hearing Senpai’s voice again. That's why I've been getting my spine corrected on a regular basis. But the other day, Takita-san showed up unexpectedly. And he told me, ‘It's time to cut off the source.’”

“Cut off… the source?”

“He was trying to remove all the taboo words that had been left behind in the school – he was probably talking about ‘Rororo’. That’s what he said. He asked me to lend him any of the things left behind by Senpai. So, I offered him the notebook that contained the taboo words – but that’s when that photograph fell out of it. That photograph Senpai and I had taken together. I thought I had burned it properly – but… no, I don't know if the memory of burning it was my desire or not -- I just don't know anymore.”

As I stared at my lap in silence, Krishna added with a groan.

“Anyway, I think it’s best to leave it to an expert from now on.”

…An expert. In short, that means it’s up to that bastard Sako.

Somehow or another, I had understood most of the story--

But even after I had finished listening, something creepy still remained. That Senpai of hers, the mystery of what she was trying to do by laying out all those taboo words on campus – and the fundamental question of where she had disappeared to and what became of her.

I asked Krishna-san, and she just shook her head slightly.

“I don’t know. No… to tell you the truth, I don’t want to know. My honest opinion might be that I don’t want to think about it at all. I have a feeling that the moment someone figures out Senpai’s plan, is when it might actually be realized.”

I shuddered at her words.

That’s right – that book she wrote. It was titled: ‘Dictation -- or the research of texts or sequences of text whose meaning, when understood, can cause spiritual phenomena’.

“It's been five years since then. Takamura-senpai is probably not alive. But if you ask me if she has disappeared from this world, I can't confirm that. That’s because Senpai’s thoughts still exist everywhere in this school.”

After that, Krishna-san shifted her gaze to the gloomy, silent Yoishi sitting next to me.

“Yoishi Mitsurugi. I sense that you see a different world than most people. And that means it's different from what Nagi-kun and I see. It’s filled with things people shouldn't know. It’s filled with things that shouldn’t be talked about. That's why I warned Nagi-kun not to get involved with you. Do you have any objection to that?”

“…I don’t.”

Yoishi muttered.

“This person and I just can't get mix.”

“Well, it's true that the confused emotions inside me are encouraging that idea even more. In other words, you remind me too much of Takamura-senpai, someone who went too far into the other world and couldn't come back. That’s somethings that’s very sad. A person who has discovered the depths of the darkness. And someone else who has become connected with that person. Mutual involvement leads everyone to misery.”

“That’s true, certainly.”

Yoishi nodded while swaying her leather shoes one on top of the other.

From the window of the Beatnik Research club, cheerful laughter emanated from the students outside and reached our ears. A breeze full of life poured into the room. Feeling it on my cheeks – I also felt an immeasurable distance between myself and Yoishi, who was sitting right next to me. It’s true that I also felt that Yoishi did not stand in the depths of darkness by choice. Something unthinkable happened in her past, which turned her into this supernatural psychic antenna that everyone is pulled towards. But I also knew that I just couldn’t do it anymore. I still have a functioning sense of fear. In addition, I'm much more unqualified than others as an occult enthusiast, and a weakling to boot.

That’s why –

That’s why, it’s impossible for me to be your friend.

I failed to say those words out loud; all I could do was continue to look downwards.

How much time had passed—

The black shadow gently moved besides me.

Yoishi lifted her pale face, straightened her legs, and leaned forwards to speak.

“But – it’s already too late.”

With a start, Krishna-san looked up as Yoishi continued:

“Because after all, the subject of that missing Senpai’s experiment… is not you.”

“…What are you saying?”

“In your evaluation of the person called Ayana Takamura, you said this: She had a strong grasp on everything from where she stood, and a strong will to accomplish her goals. She also had no lingering attachments to her flesh and body.”

“What about it?”

“With respect to the various details you’ve given us this far, you still hold a very clear memory of Ayana Takamura. It's so vivid that I can picture it in my mind when I hear it. She provided you with just one escape route, and yet, you failed to notice it.”

Krishna-san’s face grew pale at Yoishi’s intermittent speech.

“Why did you tell us about her?”

“That was because….”

“Why do you still have the notebook?”

“That was… to research taboo words, just in case….”

Krishna-san’s voice grew hoarse, as Yoishi shook her head, ‘No’.

“Ayana Takamura told you to forget everything. Her face, her voice, her scent, all of it. You were supposed to forget everything the same time you burned all her belongings. And yet --- just now, you’ve spread her existence into this world.”

Those words made Krishna-san lose her voice, and my vision darkened.

Krishna-san hated the darkness that had swallowed up her Senpai, but she couldn’t hate the person her Senpai was. That was because of Krishna's kindness and compassion, the foundation of her humanity. I knew that this compassion served as the source of her strength. But –

“Humans are the embodiment of malice.”

Without showing any mercy, and with glee spun in her words, Yoishi continued.

“That of course, includes the person who uttered those words, Ayana Takamura herself. And right now, everything is going exactly how she wished.”

Somewhere far away, I heard someone’s laughter.

A laughter filled with delight echoed, indicating that everything was going according to their plan.

The laughter kept ringing in my ears; I shook my head, as if to drive it away. But the black fog that engulfed my vision grew thicker and thicker.

Eventually, Yoishi stood up on her own, and spoke:

“In the language of flowers, the lily represents purity and innocence – but the black lily means something else.”

She slowly walked up to the door, where she turned to face us once more.

That pale face filled with ecstasy. Those dark eyes that shone with a bewitching glow. As if enjoying our speechlessness, she spoke:

“It means, ‘I curse you.’”